“Human beings are animals whose preference for group membership is simultaneously the source of their greatest salvation and their ultimate destruction“
This group of happy campers has a rude awakening afoot. Literally.
Some people would like to think that I’m a relatively smart guy. I never really took such regards seriously as I always thought that there were many, many smarter people out there. However, the more I got involved with social debating on various issues, the more I became aware of an ubiquitous intellectual deficit that would seem to suggest that the phrase “common sense” may actually be an oxymoron.
At first, I thought the deficit was a reflection of the cognitive limitations of people in my immediate environment. But when I moved my discussions to the more public domain of the internet, I encountered the same rubbish online as I did offline. As it turns out, even on the internet, the proportion of smart vs. average remained exactly the same.
I now realise that when I perceive simple-mindedness in the folks I regularly interact with in the real world, it is not limited to my immediate geographic location. It seems that 80% of the entire human race is made from the same cognitive mold. They all have the same stupid ideas and do the same stupid things – it’s herd logic.
Civilisation is a social façade designed to control mankind’s innate animalistic propensites.
I got a lot of offline commentary on the first two volumes of my abridged epiphanies. To all of those people who insist on giving me feedback in person, I encourage you to do it here. It’ll make things a lot more interesting. Additionally, I want to dedicate this particular entry to those of you responded with commentary that would suggest that I have no faith in humanity. Well congratulations: I don’t. If you take away our cellphones, our 911, our internet, our cars, our televisions, our networks, our skyscrapers, highways, transit sytems and our electricity, we would plunge right back into the brutality of the dark ages (both literally and figuratively). Humanity would be returned to the wild animals that we really are as 6.1 billion people turn on themselves. Lawlessness and anarchy would rule the world. The strong would prey on the weak, and mankind would return to the madness from which it took over 10,000 years to evolve in just 72 hours. We haven’t really changed as a people. We’ve just found better ways to control our animalistic urges through a system of sustained behaviour modification we call “civilisation“. The following epiphanies, which as far as I know are all my own, are proof of this harsh reality:
“People are nothing more than sophisticated animals living their lives as though they they were anything more than just that.”
People are fascinating creatures. Aside from their biological curiosities, there’s really not much more to them. People are nothing more than slightly sophisticated animals. It shows in the way we relate to each other and how we live our lives. Every single human behaviour can be rationalised from a very basic animalistic perspective. Most of our key behavioural traits can be expressed in highly simplistic terms that hold true for the majority of us. What makes us interesting is that much of our very existence parades on the assumption that we’re not. That’s why many of these epiphanies have proven to be such eye openers for many. People who’ve really studied human behaviour however, will not be the least bit surprised. This is the first volume in a synoptical arrangement of epiphanies I’ve had on various aspects of life. This entry tackles people’s existential quirks on a whole new level. All of this I’ve learned in the short space of time that I have lived on this rock. As far as I know, these are all my own original thoughts:
“Women were designed expressly for the explicit pacification of men, inasmuch as mankind was designed expressly for the explicit appeasement of God”
I Chauvenist Pig, do hereby declare that I love women.
I love everything about them; from how they look, how they dress, how they talk, how they walk, how they behave, how they feel to the touch – I just love them. If this sounds like just another testosterone driven baseful objectification of womankind, then I dare you to read on and I’ll prove you wrong. This is dedicated to the wholesome glorification of all that makes my penis sing. I think women are God’s single greatest creation (…well, next to the BMWs and Hondas – which you can use to get even MORE women!). I love women so much that I spent half of my short life studying these fascinating creatures. In fact, this post will become the first chapter of my new book: “Women Explained – The X Chromosone Revealed“. Now read on and let me tell you why I love these people:
“Most people are only interesting before you get to know them.”
Knowledge is dangerous. The more you know, the less mystery there is, and thus, the less interesting everything appears to be. The same is true for people. Maybe that’s why I attach such a premium to the discerning factors that I think are imperative to who I consider worthwhile making friends with. See, the problem is that I always need something unique to keep my interest. Entertaining the typical run of the mill denizens of this backwater planet is usually reserved for social occasions when you’re supposed to socialize and make light conversation. That’s something I’m totally incapable of doing, since most people are masking how uninteresting they really are. I have the attention span of a house fly and most people fail to capture it. Quite frankly, average people BORE me.
Everytime I see someone who seems interesting to talk to, the minute I open the conversation and they open their mouth, it’s like I’m watching a majestic 747 burst into flames at 35,000 feet, then slowly but poetically swoon out of the sky to greet the longing concrete below, crashing and burning in an epic ball of fire that would make Jerry Bruckheimer shed a tear of artistic appreciation. That’s why 90% of the time, if you’re talking to me and I’m not even trying to carry the conversation, (usually saying stuff like “Really? Mm-hmm. Okay. Right. Sure. Absolutely. Definitely.” – or just nodding my head innocuously, then there’s a very good chance that I’m probably just humoring you – with one ear and at most, one tenth of my attention…